Disclaimer: Characters belong to
Marvel. Story belongs to me. The time spent writing this belongs
to my squandered youth. Title is from Offspring song of same
or similar name. And for my fellow Gambitphiles, keep this
in mind-> He's DRUNK.
Innuendo. For real this time.
She Has Issues
I don't know why I bother anymore. I know she doesn't what
to talk to me right now, but I call anyway. No big deal, just
ole Remy bang his head against yet another brick wall. That's
my Roguie, all barriers and no doors. I've tried climbing
over, digging under, boring through -- to no avail. Still,
I call her with my last quarter on what might be my last night
That's not just me being overly dramatic. I really think
this is it. I can barely breathe without charging something.
I'm down to wearing shoes with rubber soles, ferchrissake.
I let the phone ring and hope the cold Salem Center air will
clear my head before she picks up the line.
We broke up. Again. For the last time. Again. It was my turn.
Again. But I'm determined to stick it out this time. I'm not
just gonna run back to her because I know she's there. I don't
have to have a beautiful woman hanging off of me at every
waking moment. I can do alone quite nicely. I can go back
to taking my relationships on the weekly, daily, or nightly
basis that worked so well for so long.
I shiver and wait. I'm dead drunk on a Tuesday night. Either
I'm becoming an alcoholic or not having Scott or the Professor
around to lecture is going to my head.
Assuming I've dialed the right number, she's not answering
her phone. I don't leave a voice mail message. Rogue's had
her eye on Petey the Rustless Wonder since they got back from
space. That's fine by me. If he's what's got her occupied,
more power to them.
I thought I had her figured out. I thought I knew want she
needed. When I got back to the future, I thought we would
finally be able to work it out. Touch was finally possible
due to the changes in my powers. And didn't we use the opportunity?
/to the fullest. Between her eagerness and my hormones, it
was like Belle and me back in twelfth grade. I think it's
fair to say that between my skill and the excitement of those
random charges, I blew her mind on a regular basis.
I'm bragging, its a statement of fact. Okay, I am bragging,
but when you're good, you're good. And I'm good. I have many
testimonials to that fact. But I wasn't good enough apparently.
I'm cold. I should go back inside. Have a few more drinks.
But I'm broke. I could get some one to buy me drinks, but
that takes effort. I'm just not up to it.
We would lie in bed together and it was like we were still
alone. I spooned for her, I cuddled, I whispered sweet nothings,
the whole nine. She still kept one layer of her armor between
us. It made me kind of bitter over time. I gave my all to
that kiss in Israel and she got past every barrier I ever
No matter how many times we made love, no matter where or
when we did it, she was only 95% there. It's like she couldn't
stop worrying about her powers or our relationship or what
ever it is that was distracting her. She wouldn't talk about
it or acknowledge what was missing. I got tired of it.
I got tired of her, in a way too. Whatever it was she wanted,
it was clear she wasn't getting it and she wouldn't even tell
me what was wrong. And it wasn't even the old "If you really
loved me you would know" garbage. It was this ignorant silence,
as if she didn't know herself.
She said something once, something I ignored because it didn't
make sense to me. She said she wanted to feel me inside of
her. Like I said, I'm pretty sure I was delivering in that
area. My response was to give her a demonstration behind the
rec-room couch. I don't know why I remember that now. It's
probably something Johnny Walker whispered in my ear. Something
he probably heard from Jack.
That's okay. I dial the number again. Collect this time.
I don't need a ride or anything like that. One Ms. Karen Degroat
is quite willing to let me stay at her place tonight. I wave
at her to keep her in her car. She shouldn't be out in this
It's not like I'm harassing her. Rogue, I mean. I just want
her to know that I know that she's got issues. And I'm glad
I don't have to deal with them any more.
Besides, I wanna hear her voice.
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