DISCLAIMER: The X-Men belong to
Marvel Comics. This is an unauthorized use of the X-Men. I
am not making any money off of this so please don't sue me.
This fanfic is copyright by me, Link.
There was no real inspiration for this story. I am just studying
for the GRE this summer. My roommate told me I needed to write
a sentence for each vocabulary word I was memorizing or a
story. As you can see, I opted for the story. If you see a
problem, like wrong usage, please be nice and email me about
Special thanks goes out to Deny Coughlan for his invaluable
All he ever wanted was some peace and quiet. Was that so
much to ask? To have one halcyon morning without having to
deal with any knavery from the far too jocund bunch of losers
that they were. As much as he loved the camaraderie of his
teammates, there were times they really got on his nerves.
Their cheery morale was enough to debilitate a cantankerous
soul like himself and turn him into an effete old man.
He slammed the door of a newly purchased refrigerator closed
and tossed the hapless bowl on the table. Nice picture, he
thought. He took note of a purple cow stuck with a magnet
to the metal door. A quick whiff and the unusual coloring
told him the artist was Scott; or Rogue had some really bizarre
coloring ideas. Colors were never Scott's forte. At least
the drawing brighten up the kitchen, which was as pallid and
lackluster as it could ever get.
His senses told him to expect unwelcome company. Bobby sauntered
in with his ebullient smile. "Hey, Wolvie. What's happening?"
He headed over to the mostly empty cabinets and started searching
nosily for something to eat.
He grumbled back a hasty good-morning while rapaciously eating
the cereal from the box. Just great. The last thing he wanted
was to have breakfast with Iceman. He was already in a bilious
mood and he could feel the hackles rising from Drake's abrupt
intrusion into his domain.
Unaware of the imminent danger Bobby had placed himself in,
he slapped Logan on the back and made a grab for his cereal
box. "Don't hog all the munchies."
"No," Logan roared. He gave an obstreperous growl
and gripped the box tighter.
"Find yer own, bub. This is mine." Bobby was getting
absolutely nothing. Not even a tiny crumb. So he had better
find something else to eat.
"C'mon. Give some here. There's nothing else to eat.
I'm starving," he whined. He made another reach for box
and missed. "Have you forgotten the concept of sharing
or did you miss that lesson in kindergarten?"
"I said go find yer own," he snarled again.
"Fine. Be that way."
Logan had only a fraction of second to react when the air
suddenly turned chilly, but he was too late. An amazing quantity
of ice miraculously appeared under his seat and sent him leaping
out of his chair with a yelp.
"Thank you very much. You are too kind," Bobby
said with a smug smirk as he proudly took the cereal box and
poured some into a bowl.
Logan rubbed his shorts which were soaked from the rapidly
melting ice and glared at the callow youth. Except for him,
such temerity was not allowed by anyone in his book. Even
if Bobby was only joking around, that was no excuse to steal
a man's breakfast. The fatuous trick was tantamount to a direct
challenge to his manhood and Bobby was delusive if he thought
he was getting away with it. Plus he was still hungry.
"Give that back, ya little runt."
"Runt? Excuse me, but who's the short one here."
He made a quick retreat with his bowl and left the empty box
discarded on the floor.
Logan approached, displaying his martial skills and baring
Somewhat nervous, Bobby edged away from him. "Chill
out, midget-man. It's only food. Sam should be back with more
so you can stuff your face all you want then."
Logan only growled and unsheathed his bony claws. Bobby's
jocular garrulity wasn't going to save him now and his egregious
name-calling only made things worse.
Logan was going to obliterate that grin from his obnoxious
face and deal out some harsh castigation. He ran and lunged
"Hey, watch it! You're going to poke someone's eye out
with that." Bobby formed his ice slide and raced out
of the kitchen with Logan close behind him.
"Get back here!"
"Out of the way. Mad dog loose," Bobby shouted.
He sledded past one startled and bemused Dr. McCoy.
"My stars-and-garters," he cried out as Logan jostled
him to the ground.
"Sorry, Hank," he shouted back. He had to stop
Drake before he go out of the mansion. Once he was outdoors,
Logan could forget about getting his cereal back. Iceman's
ice slide would take far out of his reach. That left Logan
only one tactical option: cut off his exit.
Distracting Bobby with a tossed houseplant, he raced past
him to the main door and stood his ground. Still moving at
a high speed, Bobby couldn't alter his course fast enough
to avoid the on-coming collision. Logan timed his speed and
made a leap after him.
Unfortunately for him, Bobby was more adept than Logan imagined
him to be. He successfully jumped out of the way as Logan
was about to grab him and he managed to do that without spilling
any of the cereal. As for Logan, he sailed right pass him
and crashed into the stair banister.
Bobby winced as he surveyed the damage. "Aah. That's
Logan lifted his head and found Bobby grinning. That only
worsened his implacable temper. "Why you little--"
He got up from the wreckage and charged after him with hands
out ready to strangle him.
"Yikes!" he yelped and created another ice slide.
The chase went on for another fifteen minutes. With Bobby's
illimitable supply of ice and Logan's healing factor, they
covered nearly every area of their capacious home. In that
amount of time, they ran into two of the team's neophytes
and escaped unharmed from the third. Well, almost unharmed.
The third was Marrow. They also managed to knock down three
chairs, one bookcase, two doors, and smashed one coffee table.
The coffee table Logan didn't feel too bad for. It was the
ugliest piece of furniture he'd ever seen. What was Warren
thinking when he bought it?
It wasn't until they reached the upper levels of the mansion,
toward the attic, that their chase came to an end.
"By the Goddess. What is going on here?"
"Uh oh. Mommy caught us." Bobby made an abrupt
stop, sending Logan crashing into him.
Ororo only frowned and folded her arms. She did not look
pleased. Even worse, she started tapping her foot. "I
expected better behavior from the two of you. Not this."
She turned her head toward the catastrophe they created. Pools
of water were gradually forming from the melting ice and broken
furniture laid scattered across the hallway. Logan could imagine
her calculating the costs in her head. Their destructive act
coupled with their impecunious situation made a bad combination.
Her eyes narrowed and she spoke slowly, "I do not care
who started it, nor do I want to hear reasons behind it. I
want the both of you to clean up your mess, immediately. Do
I make myself clear on this matter?"
Logan had to accede to Ororo and muttered a sorry. He was
obligated to show deference to his long time friend. Bobby
also apologized while he held the cereal bowl triumphantly
in his hand like a prize.
"Uh, Storm. Could it wait until after breakfast? I want
some milk for my cereal," Bobby asked as
he glanced over to Logan. He even stuck out his tongue at
him. He smirked. He's got him this time and he could finally
wipe off that silly grin. "Don't bother, bub. There ain't
any milk. Yer jus' gonna have ta eat it dry."
"What? You mean I went through all that and there's
no milk?" Bobby cried unhappily, "There is no justice
in this world."
"Maybe not for you," he chuckled. "Maybe not
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